Chapter 7

Here is an excerpt from chapter 7 of my book:

I went to Prairie View hospital in January of 1991. My parents thought that treating my chemical dependency might be the right course of  action. They had tried everything else and were running out of options.
Prairie View was in Newton Kansas
It was a beautiful facility. It was very different from Shephard Pratt. They did not tolerate deception and manipulation.
Within a couple of weeks of being there, I started cutting on myself. I would either use my tweezers or break a lightbulb and use a piece of the broken glass.
My self-imposed rule for cutting was that I could only stop when the cut was severe enough to need stitches. So when I had a big gapping wound, I would stop.
After several trips to the emergency room to get stitches, the staff decided to switch tactics. The next time I cut myself, they took me to the emergency room. But after we got back to the unit, they informed me that I was to sit in the time out room, read a chapter out of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, and write a paper about what I read. It was one of the first times I had been given a consequence for my behavior. And although I did not enjoy doing the assignment, it stopped me from cutting. However, if did not stop me from getting involved in other self destructive behavior.
As usual, I started up a relationship with one of the male patients. I was 20 years old and he was 16. He was severely troubled and had a propensity towards violence. He was involved in the occult and in one of our group therapy sessions, he detailed some of the satanic rituals he had taken part in. At first, I was horrified by what I was hearing.
But it didn't take long for me to go from being horrified by what he had done to developing an attraction to him.

Scripture verse: "The thief comes only to kill, steal and destroy, but I have come to give you life and to give it in abundance" John 10:10.